First There Were Bright Lights, Then Loud Noises

Ever wonder what you say to the anethesist and company as they role you into the operating room? Years ago wisdom teeth had to be extracted which was met with the need of being put under during the procedure. Later I was informed that I was in love with everything around me, "animate, inanimate it didn't matter." The dentist was an object of affection, the assistants were the epitome of Cupid's tricks, the person that drove me home considered going to the chapel, and I cried when I told Mother how much I loved her. It was a personal love-in (that's an old sixties term, uh...google it) inspired by some concoction prepared in an anesthesiologist's lair. K, I was bombed.

Many, many years ago Bernie Thibodeaux and I came home somewhere around the witching hour loaded to the gills and our excuse to our wives was that we had been apprehended by aliens. We actually cooked up this story on the way home and played it for real. Later it was revealed this was high drama at its best. Bless her heart, my ex got tickled so my shenanigans that night were forgiven. Thank God, I lived through my purple haze years. Don't want to go there again. Often I wonder, "Just what did I think I was doing when ingesting all that alcohol?" My philosophy now is that if you have lived through high school and especially college without drinking, don't start! Life is wayyyy more fun sober.

A good example of the need for sobriety is the recent Mel Gibson thangy. He was drunk, probably had no clue to his whereabouts and said some things he regrets deeply. Now Mel shouldn't have done all that for sure. But why the hell did the jerk policemen involved release this to the press. Like they'd never heard a drunk before? Go figure. It's amazing what some people will do for a little fame. Oh yeh, an alien in a space ship told me that...

"Always forgive your enemies - nothing annoys them so much."
-Oscar Wilde