Lardass Dread

It's time to break out the mower and struggle through the yard to finish a job started 4 days ago. The riding mower is so close to being operable, but I just haven't come up with the right formula for growing those two extra arms and hands. Besides, it looks like a battery needs to be purchased. We worked like dogs on it for a while, but my lazy butt gave up and started using the push mower in several short intervals. When I moved into the beach house the yard was mowed with a small push mower and the only stop was for gasoline and a refreshing beverage. Now after 3 or 4 rounds it's time to rest.





Using the riding mower is sorta' fun. I grab the MP3 player and away we go. It's tranquil and music helps drown out the noise of the mower. It has a 27" cut and the tires go flat every few days. I own an air compressor that was purchased 3 months ago. It's still in the box. Anyway, my buddy Tyroneus helped me get the cables and gas line replaced, but it still needs some reassembly and that battery. Tubes for the tires should cure the tire problem. Ahhh to have money and be able to enjoy simple things in life. Wait...if I had money I'd buy a Cub Cadet or John Deere. With a cupholder!






Enough of this daydreaming. Time to get my lardbutt up and mow until my first scheduled service call this afternoon. But first, I'll sit by the window, drink coffee and watch the morning dew disappear. Can't believe I've whined a complete post about the never ending yard mowing dilemma. Think grass grows in heaven?

"I recently had my annual physical examination, which I get once every seven years, and when the nurse weighed me, I was shocked to discover how much stronger the Earth's gravitational pull has become since 1990."
~Dave Barry